Yikes...It's been over a year!

I feel foolish because it has been  so long since my post.  The idea is to keep these posts short and frequent.  Unfortunately, at the rate I have been going there will only be 12 more posts between now and the time Paul is out of high school :).  That is how time flies. 

First off let me just say that I think this has been the best year of my life.  The kids are all at great ages and things are much easier than last year.  A family is such a blessing and I try to stay in the moment as often as I can.  Mary Sue and I watch these kids age in front of our eyes and we wish freezing time was an option. Now I am just sonding old.  Mary Sue and the kids were up north for most of the summer and I was able to be with them for about half of the time. 

First things first - Paul has gone from a crying twirp to a toddler since the last post.  He was probably our most difficult baby.  He cried a lot.  Up until about 8 months he was a 'Mama's boy' despite having the full attention of 3 older siblings.  You never know how adding a new baby will change the mood or tone of the family.  It has made our core so much stronger.  We just all enjoy sitting around and giggling at Paul.  There is no envy or attempts for attention.  The kids just adore Paul and this really surprised me.  I never would have guessed how smooth adding a new baby could have gone. 

Paul was a little late to walk when compared with our others - about 15 months.  You wouldn't guess it now.  He went from cautious to crazy in only a few weeks.  He is just one of the gang now. Paul has some interesting quirks.  Until recently, he would only sleep with little dog stuffed animals.  He had about 5 of these and he clearly knew the difference between dogs and any other animal and wanted nothing to do with them.  When he sees dogs, stuffed, in pictures, or real ones, he starts going voof - voof.  He is also fascinated by birds.  He signs for them and says ber.  Most of his words sound like that; ba (milk), ba (ball, but he usually says ohhhh when saying ball), etc.  Now Paul is absolutely fascinated with balls.  You can see him taking his ball for a walk in his baby stroller in one of the videos below.  When we put Paul in teh car he has to have at least one ball in his lap, usually a basketball.  Despite being loyal to his Mom, Paul has been transformed to a daddy's boy.  He says Dada all day while I am at worki.  We think he believes I play basketball for a living.  'Dada vroom vroom ba ba'. 

Adelina has thrived in the last few years.  She is now in kindergarten and loves school.  She is making friends and always comes home with a smile and a story.  We have shared with Adelina earlier this year that she was adopted.  There were questions about her birth Mom, Aleesia.  We explained that how we were led to foster and were blessed to have her added to our family.  We now celebrate her adoption in January, Adoption Day.  Certainly there will be more questions as she ages but we just offer her love for now.  Adelina is just one of the family and it has been that way since she arrived.  She and Paul were dedicated at our church together last year.  It was a tearful event.  Our pastor read from my blog post when she first arrived and it touched us.  She enjoys coloring, playing on the computer, snuggling, and goofing off.  She has a contagious laugh and if you start giggling she will join you even when there is nothing to laugh at.  Adelina was named the 'Star Dolphin' in her class a few weeks ago. 

Lexi is also in kindergarten.  She was picked by her teacher as the 'Citizen of the month'.  Lexi is doing quite well with reading.  She took a strong interest over the summer and can now read independently.  Lexi is our most cautious child.  She avoids trouble and thinks things through before jumping in with both feet.  Lexi can sit for a long time and just color.  She ignores the noise around her and just gets focused. I tried to pick her up and throw her on the bed the other day and it struck me just how big she had become.  She is tall and strong but she and Adelina are still my little girls.  Lexi also likes to swim and go to the beach. 

Tyler has really grown in the last year.  He is an excellent reader and an absolute math whiz.  We worked on triple digit subtraction over the summer and he now grasps the concept of multiplication and division. In the past year he has gone from comletely uninterested in sports to a sports fanatic.  He asks me every day who won what game last night. This all started about 10 months ago when I took him to a HS basketball game.  He got caught up in the emotion of the game and was hooked. Then we went to a minor league hockey game and the same thing.  This year we were luck enough to go to two Phillies games.  Now he is a huge fan and was really interested in the penant race and now the playoffs.  We just finished his first basketball league.  He is determined and athletic.  We are starting another one this week.  It as a 7 and 8 year old league so he will be challenged but will learn a lot.

Here are some insights to our past year.  The videos are at the bottom.  If you click the arrow they will play.  Turn on your speakers!

Paul Thomas Ryan

Yes...our son was finally born. Mary Sue is delighted to have him beside her rather than in her.

Let me first say that both Mom and Paul are doing absolutely terrific. The rest of us are great as well.

Paul Thomas Ryan - May 29th 2009 6:45PM - 8lbs 12ozs, 22 inches

Paul was born in our bathtub in water. It was an indescribable experience. Mary Sue did wonderfully. She never slept the previous night and still had the energy to push. She had contractions for nearly 22 hours and no epidural. I am so proud of her. It is a reminder of what we are capable of if left with no choice but to go forth.

There is something so liberating and invigorating about a newborn. It brings hope and happiness to you like nothing else. We praise and glorify the Lord for keeping both Mom and baby safe. Hallelujah!

As many of you know we used a midwife. It was truly a great experience. She was very competent, knowledgeable, calm and confident. Of course there is some nervousness and uneasiness not having a doctor. However, this is a birth. It is not a surgery or a treatment. There is something so natural and instinctive about the birth of a child.

After he was cleaned up and cared for I introduced him to his grandmother, Grammy. She was outside playing with the kids and getting ready to announce bedtime. I came to the door, opened it a crack and asked her to come over. She was oblivious to the fact that I was holding her grandson and she broke into tears. Grammy has been instrumental in sustaining Mary Sue through the last several weeks. She came 3 weeks early because we were certain that the baby was imminent. However, he just never came (must be a Mama's boy). Anyway, Grammy has taken a huge burden from me and Mary Sue and we have all enjoyed her company. The kids adore her and I think she has enjoyed this unique experience. Thank you Marcia!

After Marcia had a brief moment with Paul I asked if she would go outside and have the kids come in one at a time. I introduced them to their new baby brother. Each had a different unique reaction. It is something I will never forget and I hope they won't either. There was no jealousy or envy. They were just so genuinely happy to see him.

We decided to name him after Paul the Apostle. He was a man of strong conviction and humility. Paul brought the message of grace that was offered in faith in Jesus Christ. Once a devoted enemy of Christianity, Paul became determined to spread the message of salvation by faith.

Thomas is in honor of my grandfather. He was a great man who died 8 years ago. I miss him now as much as when he died. We had much in common.

This is Paul speaking:

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.
You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God's wrath through him! For if, when we were God's enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life! Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.
Romans 5:1-11 NIV

A Posting...Finally!

Hi all! I am sorry for my lack of diligence in adding new postings. The truth is that much has happened since the last posting and I feel like I need a long post. We'll see. In the future, I do intend to follow up with at least a new post every 2 weeks. I hope I have not lost my audience (if I ever had one :)

We had to give Wyomee back to a family member about 3 weeks ago. She was loved! I think it was the most difficult farewell for Mary Sue. There is something about a baby in the home. We had one girl from our church who was recently married take her a few times and babysit. I think she may have baby fever. Anyway, one day she picked Mimi up at 11AM and returned her around 7PM! She took her all around.

She will be missed. For a baby she was easy to care for. She slept well and was a pleasure. She even endured all of the attention the other 3 kids gave her. There was plenty of fighting over her. Even 2-3 weeks later our kids talk about her every day.

Well, about 3 hours after Mimi left we got another little guy. His name was Lecree. It was nice having another little man in the house for a change. I liked him. I lied awake one night trying to figure out how 2 parents could fail a child so miserably. He was adorable and wanted to cling to anyone that would show him that he was to be adored. There was no way he would sleep alone while he was here and since it was only one night we did not make him. He awoke in the middle of the night and neede to lay on top of me. He could not be close enough from his perspective. Someone told Mary Sue something very simple that sticks with me; She said 'God does not love any child any less than another'. In real terms, my child is no more precious to Him than one that was abandoned.

Anyway, Lecree was wanted by another family member. He was only with us the one night. This is the second time this occurred. Truthfully, it was encouraging that another family was so interested in him. We had another little guy named Devon that was given up by his grandparents for 24 hours. They changed their minds a short time later. The case worker thought that the grandparents were trying to have their daughter (the birth mother) get her act together by threatening to put the grandchild in foster care. The mother was a cocaine addict with a trust fund (bad combo).

For the moment we have only Adelina as an addition. She has been with us for some time. You would not believe the growth. She had difficulties walking when she first arrived. Now she chases after the others. She is climbing with confidence and sturdier in her step. Her language has improved as well.

The other day we were all trying to get the kids in the car to go to the park. It is like a pack of dogs sometimes. As soon as you try to pin one down the other goes off running. I need a muzzle. Back to my point. I was getting Adelina changed and to keep her from running away while I got another dressed i put her on the toilet. I came back about 2 minutes later. She was off and had just flushed the toilet. I thought 'Surely she did not just go to the bathroom'. Just for kicks I put her back on to wipe her bum. She had done it! I looked around the room if there was doo-doo anywhere but there was not. Do you know how long it took us to train our two? She was very casual about it. I asked her 'Where is the poop?' and she pointed to the toilet. We all gave her praises. She was so proud when she realized how big of a deal it was.

Adelina is in a preschool. She mostly goes weekdays 9-2. It is a sanity break for Mary Sue and is clearly beneficial to her.

Tyler started school about 4 weeks ago. He loved it from the start. He cannot wait to get on the bus. He goes everyday as if he were in kindergarten. It is a smaller group and is language intensive. I don't know how he would fill a whole day without it. He has such a curiosity and energy.

I recently got a new desktop. Ty picked it up right away. It is a great tool for encouraging him to learn. He has a real interest in words and sounds.

Alexia is finding she has alot more alone time with her Mommy. It is less crazy to bring one child to eat out. Often, Lexi looks forward to lunch. In fact, they have come to meet me for lunch. She is delightful to have.

Last week I had her up at Eamon's new place. We took them to the pool. Nature called so I took her to the bathroom. As we entered she jumped the threshold and when her wet feet landed on painted concrete she slipped and slammed her head....HARD. It was scary. She would not talk and her eyes were a bit goofy. She napped for a bit and she woke up much better. She is milking it. Every day she tells me that she fell in the bathroom and that her head hurts. She has a smirk on her face when she says it.

Timia is Gone...Wyomee arrives...

My Personal favorite.

Sorry I have not posted in a awhile. It has been busy on many fronts. Mary Sue is really wrapped up with what is going at home and I am showing a lot of property.

Timia left us on Saturday. She had a wonderful spirit. Our kids loved her and ask about her daily. She is back with her Grandmother. Mary Sue was there to hand her over to her Grandma. Apparently, she did not look much older than us. It is a good thing for Timia. She is with family and there are older kids in their house that are looking forward to having her back. We have found that the Grandma had been caring for her for about a year now. We think she was actually doing a good job doing so. The state was just unclear about the details so they pulled her out while they investigated. She was glad to be going back. During the exchange Timia was quiet and confused. Hopefully, it is the last stop for Timia. She deserves it. Mary Sue made her a photo album of her time she spent here. She clung to it just as she clung to Mary Sue during her time here.

We got a call this afternoon that there was a 4 month old that needed a placement. At first, we said no. We thought about it (and prayed) then called back. We had a few more questions and decided to take her. We had her in our arms in about an hour. Her name is Wyomee. She is cute but...she is a chub. We have been calling her Mimi.

The kids could not wait to get their mitts on her. They all wanted to hold her bottle and get her to smile. When Ty saw her in the car I asked him if he liked her. He said, "Yes... God made her."

Since the last post Tyler had his birthday party. It was great. It was a sunny day and we had it at a park. There were so many kids. We are lucky. We have great friends here.

Here Mary Sue is leading the marching band...

Here is a cool visual. The church we attend had great symbolism. They were talking about tithing and giving. The kids had a Bible School campaign that they are to give an amount of pennies that, when stacked, would equal their height. During the sermon they had the kids come in through the back of the church. The video and my story does not do it justice...Anyway, Tyler was on of the kids to come in the back and many people teared. It was nice. Check the video below.

End of January

Now surely 2007 came and went like a breeze. Yet, I am blown away that the first month of 2008 has already passed. I guess as we age time really passes briskly.

We still have the 2 girls, Adelina and Tamia. We are having some contact with case workers. There may be some contact with family members in the coming weeks for Adelina. There is an uncle in Virginia that would like to have her. It is tough to get accurate information out of anyone. Luckily, kids have a way of adjusting to a new environment quickly. They make no mention of anyone or anything in their past.

Everybody in our house got a case of a cold. It moved through house like a tornado. Adelina must have sneezed 200 times over a 48 hour period. Each time you knew she cleaned out her sinuses because would hang from her nostrils. It was truly gross. I was going to post a picture of it but I am sure you get the visual.

Tamia has clearly established her role as the rock star of the family. Everybody wants to be with her. She is delightful and charming. She is also very obedient and learning to be polite. She picks up on things quickly. We are starting to learn to count and she soaks it all up with a big grin.

Adelina can be as loud as the rest of the crew. She is really about a year delayed physically and verbally. At 30 months she still does not have a real sense of balance. From what we understand, she was in a house that spoke Spanish up until 6 months ago. I don’t think she has any memory of Spanish but English is definitely new to her. She mostly smiles and says ‘Mommy’ no less than 300 times a day. Our home is an environment that will push her. It is good for her development.

Ty had an evaluation with a psychologist today. It went great. He cannot believe what he read from his reports on Tyler’s past behaviors and where he is now. He is truly making long strides each month. He now sleeps in the top bunk of the bed. He just turned 4 the other day. His birthday party is this weekend at a park. I’m sure we will have many pictures to follow.

Alexia will astound people when they see her next. Her hair is long and almost blonde from the sun. She is a full head above Tamia in height. Her shoes are huge for her age. She is so goofy and playful. Her laugh is infectious. As a Dad, I am starting to fear how pretty she will be as she gets older. The last thing a father wants is a ‘hot’ daughter. Geez! I better get Tyler in martial arts.

This is a video of the girls playing with tennis balls.

This video is hilarious. The humor is something you would see on Bugs Bunny. Alexia is trying to teach Tamia a prayer. Tamia insists on her way and frazzles Lexi.

Recent Pictures

This is the time of year we get to rub it in a bit! Seen a sky like that recently?



Adelina Tamia





Here are some recent pictures and video. Remember, if it has an arrow below the picture you click on the arrow twice to start the video clip. Turn the volume up on your computer.

Don't drink the bath water!

We give the kids a dance of encouragement after successfully going potty. Lexi is giving Tamia one...

Silent Night?

Backyard Ride.

Balroom Dance.

Two New Girls

The newest event in our lives is the two new girls we have in our home. We got Timia about a week ago and Adelina about three days ago. I will follow up with some pictures and video soon. However, I need to take some :)

So, we have three girls all born in the same month, July '05. They are all quite different!

Timia has emerged as the 'fun' little girl. She has been a breeze. Tyler really takes to her. They both have a silly sense of humor. Lexi plays (or runs) right along too. The only noticeable thing is that Timia has the worst hernia I have seen. It is right in her belly button area. It sticks out at least 3 inches. I don't think it causes much pain but it will need surgery someday. We like to watch her dance and hop. She constantly wants her cup. She loves to eat but only when it is not time to eat. Poor Timia showed up at our house at midnight when she first arrived. She woke up once we brought her inside. Could you imagine waking up in a strange place looking at strange people when you were less than 3? The next day she realized this was a safe place and she had a few kids to play with her. She has adjusted quickly and is a delight to have.

Adelina has come to us from another foster family. Ultimately, she may wind up with an uncle who wants her from another state. She has a smile that will make you laugh. Huge dimples lay in the middle of the most pinchable cheeks. She has long black hair. She is affectionate and happy. Not much sways her from her joy. She too loves to eat! Although, most of her food winds up on the floor. On her second morning here Mary Sue went to see her downstairs. Adelina stood at the bottom of the stairs with a handful of dookie she had pulled from her diaper. Good morning!

It really is a roller coaster ride here everyday. It is amazing the energy that is fueled by 4 little kids all under four years old.

Since we started fostering people have asked us 'Where did you the inspiration to do this?'.

A few weeks ago I saw Kay Warren on TV being interviewed about a new book. She is an author and wife of Rick Warren who had the best selling book Purpose Driven Life. She has taken up the cause of caring and working to save the children of Africa that have been swept up in the AIDS epidemic. The man interviewing her asked her a similar question...'What caused you to take up this cause?'. Her answer was immediate and profound. She said 'I did not choose this. I traveled to Africa and God put this in front of me'. She continued 'I knew I needed to obey'.

This struck me because this is PRECISELY what Mary Sue said to me when I asked her where this was coming from. We knew nothing about fostering. For me, it was a term I had heard but never gave it a second thought. Mary Sue said that she just knew it was put in front of her to do and that she could not ignore it. I'm still not sure how I got mixed up in all of this!:)

I thought a good quote pertaining to this topic would be from the man himself, Jesus.

"Amen, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever receives one child such as this in my name receives me."

Matthew 18:3-5